Thursday, April 12, 2012

From 24 to Perry Mason to Law and Order... It all Sucked

Ellie came home one night from visitation visibly upset.  She told me that DP had 2 bags packed.  One for her and one for him.  In those bags were all of her clothes that belonged at his house, a toothbrush and toothpaste, stuffed animals and pull-ups for the nights.  

In his bag were plenty of clothes and toiletries.  

When she asked where they were going, he responded on a trip.  When she asked did her "m-o-m know?" (she was now spelling mom instead of saying it) He said no and it was a secret that she couldn't tell me.  

I, of course, knew nothing of this trip and the very thought of him taking her from me shook me to my core.  A call to my lawyer and of course, nothing that I could do.  We couldn't go in with the threat of him taking her, we couldn't go in with hearsay.  This is the gut-wrenching stuff that was dealt with for about a month.  

From that day on, Ellie would never go to him without my phone number on the inside of her sock, purposefully written in a way that she could pull her sock down and read it the quickest. Though she knew my number, in a state of panic I was worried she would forget it.  She would also have a piece of paper that said, "my dad has taken me please call the police and then my mom at _____ " and my cell number. Ellie understood that if taken to any kind of public transit area she was to go to the bathroom and give that information to anyone.  She could also try to make a break for it and find a person who would call me with the number on her sock.  Or she could also seek out a policeman.  She was not afraid to raise hell by just screaming as well.  We arrived even earlier to each visitation to go over this and make sure the number on the sock wasn't showing, and the paper could not easily be found.  

Every night when she was returned it was if I could breath again.  

*****

As the months went on, the trip was talked about more by DP.  My fear level increased dramatically.  Ellie was positive she would be taken on a certain Wednesday night.  He had been talking about it over and over again.  My lawyer said I could do one of three things.  I could let it go and hope for the best (it was this information that led me to realize I needed another lawyer... coming soon...  stay tuned), I could not show up for the visitation time (this would put ME in contempt of court, and while this sounds funny, it was a fear of mine.  Believe me, I am all for doing anything for my daughter - even going to jail for being in contempt... but was this just putting off the inevitable?).  Or, I could follow them.  

A plan was made and not only did I follow him, but a group of very great people did.  We all met in the parking lot of FM where we did the hand off for Ellie.  One of the followers had even gotten a conference call line and we all called in so we knew where everyone was and no one would lose him.  Or if someone did, hopefully someone else would pick him up.  

You think at this point in the mini series you are changing the channel because I am making this up... I am not.  

It turned from Perry Mason to 24 with me being Jack Bauer.  I didn't tell Ellie we would be there, but did go through the usual prep with her.  She was VERY nervous this night and I tried to reassure her best I could that all would be okay.  A fair amount of eyes would be watching after all and there was no way he was leaving with her.  

DP came in and the two of them left together.  As they did, I ran out to one of the cars waiting, there was no way I was driving, I was a bit too hysterical.  I believe in all we had 4 cars.  We talked back and forth about where he was and what they were doing.  They first stopped at a bakery, then a drive through and then they went to a local high school.  There was a basketball game going on there.  At this point, I felt pretty confident he wasn't leaving with her.  I was terribly appreciative of the followers, the other 24 characters and they all left.  I stayed in the car I was in to see the night through.  

After the game came another restaurant and then him driving around only to show up to FM late.  

The amazing thing, well... several amazing things that night... but one of the amazing things was that Ellie was famished when I got her.  I, of course, knowing they had been to THREE food establishments found that somewhat surprising.  She explained that they went to a bakery and Jack-in-the-box for DP's girlfriend and son, but they did not get Ellie anything.  The last stop was for Ellie but she did not want anything there and there wasn't enough time.  

****

At this point it was time to find another lawyer.  Interestingly enough, my dad made the suggestion.  I was getting no where on a case that seemed open and shut.  

When you look at how Ellie was being treated, it was eating at her.  She was sometimes being seen by DP.  And when she was, it was chaotic hours.  She was never happy.  We were worried about her safety and whereabouts.  And worried about whether would return.  

The breaking point was on Easter when DP showed up an hour and 15 minutes late.  I was waiting the entire time in the FM lobby.  A wreck.  

No phone calls. 
No texts. 
Nothing from him. 

I thought for sure he had taken her. 

It had to stop and it had to stop soon.  

We were going to the top with lawyers.  

Step aside Perry Mason, Law and Order, here we come.  

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